Each Wednesday, I participate in a gathering of women who believe in making wishes and taking steps to achieve their desires. This week Jamie asks, What do you wish for your health & wellness?

I’ve set many goals and some I feel were such a stretch that I cannot possible make it to the goal. I want to believe. But I have fears that I cannot physically get there with my body, health, and my “diagnosis.”

I start to feel strong and then another setback comes in, and another. And the hurdles seem taller and taller.

Within the space of 5-days I was glutened twice (Celiac). I missed a week of exercise and a week of physical therapy. The arthritis in the ball of my right foot screams at me as I change my footfalls to a forefoot landing (heel striker). My knee and hip feel strong running 1 mile.

My goal is to run 13.1 miles on Grand Island. I need to register for the event. I need to do so, now.

I worry what people think. I worry what I think. I worry that I may be throwing my entry fee and an extra ferry pass out the window. (want Mike to come with me)

I try to bolster my faith and my self-esteem by saying the woman in the picture who is smiling ran a 10K (1 day prior) on a tough and highly technical trail. That the woman was once afraid of heights and is in a lighthouse, outside, high-up, leaning on the railing with wind blowing. That woman ran a race with a taped-knee and then hiked waterfalls going down stairs backwards (knee pain after race) because she is determined to enjoy life.

Today, (6-months after the photo was taken) I look in the mirror and I am fearful.

I want courage. I need stamina. I need to eat clean. Drop 10-20 pounds. I need to take my recovery seriously. I need to run that race. I will run that race. I will run that race. I will run that race.

My wish is that I continue to grow strong in body, mind and spirit so I can reach for my dreams and goals.